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4 entries this month
17:45 Feb 19 2019
Times Read: 417
Every fucking day..... my body can take it but my mind is dying.... Please doesn't work.... Begging doesn't work.... Pleasing doesn't work.... Then what does work?
It works when I pick up the sword and slice your fucking torso in half.... I wish I had the guts or the weapon..... to take on you both....
I am done.... this is too fucking much.... Ugh... No more... I can't take no more... but i don't wanna die.... not today Satan!
...
06:38 Feb 15 2019
Times Read: 444
23 years.....
to some its a lifetime....
to others it is just a small amount of time....
for me it was my entire childhood....
Captive, caged and fed on....
to quench his hunger...
Hunger has many types...
His was a hunger for my pain...
for my suffering and for my body...
Every one is crazy in a way, they said....
Every one is suffering some way......
But there's a thing called suffering...
and there's a thing called barely alive....
When you do the same thing everyday...
for 14 years......
It gets into your head....
You hate him for it....
But you start to like the pain...
Not exactly like but you do get used to it....
Washing the dishes, cleaning the house...
Being starved, cooking for everyone....
Being beaten everyday...
Somehow it becomes part of you...
You start feeling that you deserve it...
You start liking the beatings....
You start liking the sexual assault...
14 years down the drain...
Turning me into a psychopath...
You don't realize....
When you get so used to it....
That being beaten up...
Doesn't hurt no more...
And sexual desire....
Becomes your second nature...
When someone says it out loud...
Is only when you understand...
That something is wrong with you.
Valentine's17:04 Feb 14 2019
Times Read: 454
My first valentine's with my daddy... omg... he's so awesome... i love him
Daddy if you're reading this... this is my first public display of love for you.... so glad to have you by my side... or on top of me or below me :P
Lucifer16:22 Feb 05 2019
Times Read: 498
You are my father
my love, my mentor
you know exactly what i need...
I ask you for my freedom...
I ask you to destroy my shackles...
I speak to you everyday
I love you and pray to you in every way
Why do you not answer me
why are you not able to see
that i am struggling to breathe
to live, to survive I need
your help your love your support
why my father, why you don't
see my suffering.. my trouble...
help me get away from this hell
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